Instant Messaging & Stupid Men on the Web.

I am often logged onto the Yahoo instant messenger for about 18 out of every 24 hours. I use it to chat with my "boyfriend" during the day and to keep up with my kids. I have few other folks on there there I chat with. I have a couple of friends from a former company and a couple of former tech support folks from a software company that every now and then pop up with a "hi," other than that, I can go for days without a message form someone I know. I wish I could say the same about the messages I get from folks I don't know.

Being a woman with a profile that says I am single gets me all sorts of attention. Sometimes I ignore it and sometimes I play along for a few moments. It really depends on my mood. Even on the days when I "play along" I am irritated by this. I just don't understand why men think that just because a woman is online and logged into an instant messenger that she wants random IM's from guys looking for cyber sex. Can someone answer this question for me?

I thought that for your amusement I would give you a sampling of the kinds of opening lines I get. So, for your enjoyment, here are a few:

This is JCK61384, his Yahoo profile says he is 21 and lives in Southern Minnesota:

jck61384: i love older woman...i saw you were single and was hoping you would give me a chance..just to chat

jenn_a_carlson: Not really interested in someone as young as you or anyone who would say "I love older women"

jck61384: do you want to chat?

jenn_a_carlson: Sorry. No.

jck61384: i have this fantasy of being a boy toy for an older woman..but i'm sure that doesnt interest you?

jenn_a_carlson: You don't interest me.

This is a "Real Man" apparently. The following are messages I received on 3 separate occasions over the course of four months. I am not sure what that means but if you have an idea please let me know.

Random IM from "Real Man" number One:

real man: hey jenn what's up? (***Note: the use of my first name, as though he knows me)

real man: **insert smiley face here

real man: Hello? why not chat with me?

real man: hey what's up?

real man: wana see my cam?

real man: **insert smiley face here

jenn_a_carlson: please leave me alone. I am not interested.

Random IM from "Real Man" number Two:

real man: you like to watch guys masturbate on cam?

jenn_a_carlson: LEAVE ME ALONE.

Random IM from "Real Man" number Three:

real man: what's up?

jenn_a_carlson: what part of leave me alone did you not understand from last time you im'd me?

real man: sorry

real man: just saying hi

Occasionally when I get a random IM I like to look at their profile so I can have something to give them crap about. This guy had nothing. Here is his explanation:

schi0246_2: how are you doing?

jenn_a_carlson: How come you don't have any info on your profile?

schi0246_2: my old profile got hacked and just made this new one

schi0246_2: sohaven't yet gotten to it

schi0246_2: i'm 30 m from minneapolis mn

jenn_a_carlson: I think either we have chatted before or "my profile got hacked" is a common line among men who IM random women on Yahoo.

schi0246_2: i swear its true

schi0246_2: my old id was schi0246 so i added the _@

schi0246_2: _2

schi0246_2: but we haven't chatted before

jenn_a_carlson: Hmmm...well that "hacked" line has been used about a dozen times from other random guys who I have asked why they have not profile info.

schi0246_2: well what would you like to know

jenn_a_carlson: Whatever you want to tell me.

schi0246_2: i'm an open book

jenn_a_carlson: I like books on tape - they do all the work.

schi0246_2: well i'm 30 from minneapolis i work as a chemist , never married and no kids

schi0246_2: lol

schi0246_2: what about you (**Note: My Yahoo personal says my name and in order find out I was online he had to search these, he knows how old I am already.)

schi0246_2: married?

schi0246_2: single?

schi0246_2: what do you do

If there are any men reading this who can shed some light on why men think it is OK to send random messages to women please let me know. I would love to know what the mentality is behind this behavior.